The worst day of my life - Turning negativity into focus

I can still remember the date as if it were yesterday - July 5th, 2016. The irony of the 5th of July as Independence Day in the US, the 5th of July was the date that was set for the amputation of my lower limb. Despite an elective amputation, it was the day that I had felt as though my world had turned upside down.

I had been fighting for this amputation for 6 years and had been in a wheelchair for 14 years. I had undergone 35 operations, years of counselling, multiple surgeon visits and was at the end of my tether. On top of this, I was in constant pain, my sleep was awful and I was unable to walk, spending most of my days worrying about anyone touching my foot

I had finally reached the point where I couldn't take it anymore. I knew that amputation was my only chance at a better quality of life and the date had been booked for months. The day before the surgery, I traveled 7 hours to the hospital, ready to finally have my surgery. I had postponed a career for this surgery, my cats were put into a cattery and I had rented my flat out through AirBnb, as I would be recovering in hospital. My family was there to support me, and I was so excited to finally be getting the relief I had been craving.

But then, just 10 minutes before the anesthetic, despite fasting and getting changed, the surgeon came into my room. He explained that they still weren't 100% on board with the amputation and that I needed more tests and procedures before they could go ahead……..I was absolutely devastated. I had worked so hard for this, and now it was all being taken away from me. I felt like my whole world was crumbling.

I spent the next seven hours driving back home, feeling lost and hopeless. Was all of this work worth it? Would I ever walk again? Would it ever happen

I didn't know what to do. I felt like I had hit rock bottom.

But then, something amazing happened. My family and friends rallied around me. They told me that I wasn't alone, and that they would support me no matter what. Their words gave me the strength to keep going and I knew that I had to find a way to get through this. I started to fight again. I attended appointment after appointment, and I eventually got the approval for my amputation just ten weeks after they had cancelled the surgery, just ten minutes before the procedure was due to happen.

I know that the day I was scheduled for my amputation was the worst day of my life, but it also led me to appreciate how much focus and drive I had to make the amputation happen. I am so grateful for the journey I have been on. and those who have supported me through it It has taught me the importance of resilience, determination, and never giving up on your dreams. It has also taught me that sharing my story with others has such a benefit to their own journey as it has allowed them to be open to new opportunities.

I am so grateful for the opportunities that have come my way since then - I have traveled the world, met amazing people, and achieved things that I never thought possible. I know that it is possible to overcome your challenges and come out stronger on the other side, despite severe challenges.

Every year I remember the day when I felt as though my world had crumbled and remember the resilience that I used to get through it - I use this memory to keep pushing myself to new levels every year.

I am a survivor. I have faced challenges that would have broken most people, but I have never given up on my dreams. I have learned that strength, determination, and resilience are not defined by what happens to us, but by how we respond to it. I have also learned that the darkness is not the end of the story. It is simply a part of the journey. When we make it out of the dark tunnel, we appreciate the light that is on the other side even more.

So keep fighting. Keep believing in yourself. And never give up on your dreams. You are stronger than you think. You are more resilient than you know. And you can achieve anything you set your mind to.

I am a survivor. And so are you.